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Family of alcoholic enables after mother's death

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My father is a 70-year-old alcoholic and gambler who refuses to accept help.

My mother kept him in "check" for 50 years, but she died last year.

Being of the "old school" generation, she did everything for him, down to tying his shoes.

Now that she is gone, he expects the entire family to just pick up where my mom left off. He ...Read more

Give Thanks On Memorial Day During Moment Of Remembrance

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: Americans are at their best when they unite around a noble purpose. On Memorial Day, that purpose is the National Moment of Remembrance. On that day, all Americans are asked to pause wherever they are at 3 p.m. local time to honor our fallen.

In 1971, No Greater Love, a patriotic organization, was founded by a woman named Carmella ...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 5/27/2016

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: There is a couple that socializes with us and our friends. They constantly drop hints that their adult children (living at home) should be invited to our events. They say things like, "Becky would really enjoy coming to your house. She loves the way you cook." Sometimes they just show up at the door with their adult children and say,...Read more

Childless Couple

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

What do people really want to hear when they ask when my husband and I are going to have children? When I say we don't plan to, the next question is, why not? Do I tell them it was a tough decision to make and one I find myself struggling with but know to be the right one? That we can barely keep ourselves afloat financially or...Read more

High school student worries about friend's cutting

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I have a friend, "Morgan," who I found out has been cutting herself. Morgan has struggled with depression since she was young. She seemed to hit her rock-bottom this past summer. She started cutting her arms with kitchen knives and scissors, including at my own birthday party.

At first she said it had been an accident, but as I saw ...Read more

Mom Objects When Kids Are Made To Pay For Roughhousing

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: We visit my in-laws two or three times a year. During our most recent visit, my kids (ages 12 and 14) were roughhousing with their cousins and accidentally slammed a door, which resulted in a broken frame. Their grandpa had asked them to stop, which they apparently didn't do.

Now, three months later, my in-laws are visiting us, and ...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 5/26/2016

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: Until two years ago, I thought we had a loving family, even though my husband and I are divorced. We have two grown children in their 50s.

Two years ago, my son asked me to co-sign a college loan for his child. When I declined, he said he was "done with this whole family," and has not spoken to any of us since.

I live several ...Read more

Trusted Friendship

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

I recently confided in a good friend some personal news, and told her not to tell anyone. I didn't think trusting her was a problem, as she has confided in me numerous times in the past and I have kept her personal stories to myself.

Within a few days, she had told two other friends. ...Read more

College-bound girl worries about pledge to parents

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am about to graduate from high school. I am very happy with my college choice and I am majoring in STEM, so I am looking forward to being part of the growing group of young females in the scientific world; however, I have concerns about the social changes in college.

I have always been a good girl who stayed away from boys in high ...Read more

Mom Who Wanders At Night Could Be Ill Or Just Nosy

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: My mom lives with me and my hubby. Recently I found out that she walks around at night because she hears noises or is restless -- and puts her ear on our bedroom door, too!

I was shocked. I think this is a complete invasion of my privacy, and I was embarrassed to no end. I now avoid getting intimate with my hubby, and he has no idea ...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 5/25/2016

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: I am 71 years old, and I have taken care of my neighbor, "Martha," for 15 years. I did everything for Martha, including shopping, taking her to doctor appointments and fixing anything that needed repairs. She passed away last year and had no will.

Martha has one daughter who lives in another state. The daughter left with her stepdad...Read more

Secretive Sisters

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

My mom died two years ago and she ruled my parents' relationship. My 86-year-old father has never had to make any decisions and can't step up to keep the family together.

One of my five sisters, "Rosie," has alienated all of us (by being verbally abusive) but lives closest to my father and has ingratiated herself into his life...Read more

Man wonders why his 'Hollywood hello' goes badly

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I'm a middle-aged, white, gay man living in West Hollywood. I'd like your advice on the proper way to give a friendly acknowledgment to women as I pass them on the street.

I try to make eye contact and smile when I walk past people. However, I often find that women respond in a way that suggests they feel threatened by my attention. ...Read more

Funding For Cancer Sufferer Seems Brazen To Co-Worker

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: A co-worker has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. She's not sure how long she may have. She is relatively young, so it's tragic. We have excellent insurance from work, national health care and disability insurance.

Another co-worker sent out an email with a link to a crowdfunding site as well as an invitation to a party selling ...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 5/24/2016

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: We live in a friendly town. Yet, we have some residents who are terribly disrespectful people of other people's property.

We've had dogs and love dogs, but we would never think of taking our dog to our neighbor's lawn to do its duty. We've consulted several experts and they all say that the dog's urine can cause brown spots on the ...Read more

Gauging Time Apart

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Hi, Carolyn:

How much time apart should a couple who live together have per week? I'm trying to gauge the healthy amount of togetherness and quality time as opposed to time apart with friends, family, and weekend overnights away from each other.

-- Gauging Time Apart

Some people don't need any,...Read more

He wants to fix dysfunctional family

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My wife's family is dysfunctional (aren't we all?).

Her brother is deeply estranged from his mother, yet continues to live in his parents' home into his 20s.

They are a wealthy family, and my brother-in-law is accustomed to a certain lifestyle.

They fight often, and my wife and I are the only members of the family he speaks to (...Read more

Couple's Counseling Should Occur Together, Not Apart

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: My girlfriend and I have been together for three years and have a 1-year-old daughter. Unfortunately, our fights have become more frequent now. She suggested counseling, which I agree with. However, she insists I'm the one who is causing the problem and I should go first.

Sometimes we fight about finances, since I work to support our...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 5/23/2016

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: I work in an area where we are allowed to listen to the radio during work hours. This is great, as I enjoy the music. The problem is, one of our co-workers feels the need to loudly sing along to the songs. It is extremely annoying and also distracting.

I am hoping this letter will be an eye-opener to all of those people who act like...Read more

New Relationship, but Old Parents

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

I'm married with two kids. I went through a lot to figure out why I can't have a good relationship with my parents and probably never had one.

It's clear to me now that they are trying to have a relationship with their kid, not their adult child. They get angry and afraid when I ...Read more